The VENT Thread

Re: The VENT Thread

Postby Ballerina » Sat Jan 13, 2018 8:53 pm

As far back as I can remember in my work career, I never made enough money to live comfortably. My father died when I was 16. My mother had no job skills and she convinced me that it was the child's place to take care of the parents when they grew old. I bought into that and worked 2 sometimes 3 jobs to support myself and my mother who expected me to turn over my paychecks to her and she'd dole out money as she saw fit. When she died, that burden was lifted, but she left me with nothing. I knew many people living hand to mouth on wages that weren't livable. So it's NOT something recent.

My mother died when I was 26. I married Bill when I was 27. Our combined gross income was $300/wk. Our apt.rent was $145 month. We decided to buy a house. Mtg was $135 mo., but that didn't include insurance, taxes, oil, electricity, repairs, etc., etc. We both worked a 2nd job. Never racked up debt. We sometimes ate corn flakes for dinner, and some weeks I couldn't buy tooth paste and under arm deodorant in the same week. We never fought over money. We just bit the bullet and dug in for the long haul.

We both worked hard, had a strong work ethic which helped gain a better position in the companies for which we worked. It's only been the last 20 years of our marriage that we've been able to afford more than just the necessities. We knew early on that social security wouldn't sustain us if we lived to old age. Bill joined the military reserves even after serving 6 years in the USMC. He served for 20 years and retired with a pension at 62 and supplemental health benefits to Medicare. We both stayed long at the companies for which we worked, so we'd walk away with a good retirement. We bought property that would be an investment - not ego mansions. They all turned out well.

We planned for the future, never lived outside our means - still don't - and never racked up debt. It's the best advice I can give anyone - even now. But, what do I know? I'm an 8th decade survivor living comfortable who hasn't a clue.

And I would have written, "if God lets you live as long", but I knew it would piss Som off even more. :-)
Last edited by Ballerina on Sat Jan 13, 2018 9:22 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: The VENT Thread

Postby stark » Sat Jan 13, 2018 9:10 pm

Bal,
Congrats on a job well done.
Must be very gratifying as you look back now and realize how many obstacles you had to face head-on and overcome during the long journey of life including your own very serious health issues.

Especially when compared to being 28, living for free with your parents and complaining about how rough life is, LOL.
I've found it easier to tear up tickets at 8/1 instead of 8/5.
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Re: The VENT Thread

Postby Somnambulist » Sat Jan 13, 2018 9:31 pm

I don't say things like if you live as long. That's actually callous. I'd never say anything like that to anyone.

I feel I've been nothing over the years on this forum but supportive of all your health problems. I've offered nothing but well wishes and prayers so I'm not sure why you are essentially saying the opposite for me.

Oh well. Continued happiness and health.
"Life's no piece of cake, mind you, but the recipe's my own to fool with."
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Re: The VENT Thread

Postby Ballerina » Sat Jan 13, 2018 9:42 pm

Somnambulist wrote:I don't say things like if you live as long. That's actually callous. I'd never say anything like that to anyone.

I feel I've been nothing over the years on this forum but supportive of all your health problems.

Oh well. Continued happiness and health. People are rotten and it's not age exclusive.


Oh, please, you're just making something up to be angry about. It wasn't a wish for you not to live long. Life is short, regardless of how long you live because the days grow short when you reach September. I think I heard that in a song. :-) One never knows how long they get to live. It's not callous; it's reality. I know far too many of friends and family who didn't get the privilege to grow old. But, growing old sucks. You just have to have tough nads to get through it and complain a lot - God lets you live longer.
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Re: The VENT Thread

Postby Somnambulist » Sat Jan 13, 2018 9:47 pm

You're so full of shit.

I have more than one diagnosis that would qualify me for disability and I don't file. I'm in A LOT of pain daily. I don't need to hear about how life is hard. I worked 3 jobs are once to keep the electric on and food in our fridge and have never once lived outside my means. There was a full year where there was nothing more than $3 in my account after my bills were paid. But I got through that.

So truly, fuck you. I've worked hard through pain and been grateful for the love and family I have. It's more than most have.

This forum is the worst and I've never met someone good off it.
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Re: The VENT Thread

Postby stark » Sat Jan 13, 2018 10:15 pm

Somnambulist wrote:You're so full of shit.

I have more than one diagnosis that would qualify me for disability and I don't file. I'm in A LOT of pain daily. I don't need to hear about how life is hard. I worked 3 jobs are once to keep the electric on and food in our fridge and have never once lived outside my means. There was a full year where there was nothing more than $3 in my account after my bills were paid. But I got through that.

So truly, fuck you. I've worked hard through pain and been grateful for the love and family I have. It's more than most have.

This forum is the worst and I've never met someone good off it.


Oh my!

I'll take a wild guess and say there's probably a pretty good dent in one of those free whiskey bottles on a lonely Saturday night?
I've found it easier to tear up tickets at 8/1 instead of 8/5.
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Re: The VENT Thread

Postby Ballerina » Sat Jan 13, 2018 10:18 pm

Somnambulist wrote:You're so full of shit.

I have more than one diagnosis that would qualify me for disability and I don't file. I'm in A LOT of pain daily. I don't need to hear about how life is hard. I worked 3 jobs are once to keep the electric on and food in our fridge and have never once lived outside my means. There was a full year where there was nothing more than $3 in my account after my bills were paid. But I got through that.

So truly, fuck you. I've worked hard through pain and been grateful for the love and family I have. It's more than most have.

This forum is the worst and I've never met someone good off it.


For crissake, Som, calm down. And talk about callous. Oh, POT! Just what the hell did I say that you are taking so personally. Maybe one of your diagnoses is getting intervention for anger management. And screw you too and the horse you rode up on. Bitch.
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Re: The VENT Thread

Postby starrydreamer » Sat Jan 13, 2018 10:40 pm

Oh good grief, everyone.

Som came to my defense when I got attacked for venting about health insurance as it relates to my child. In the vent thread. And I've since been told that I'm a habitual complainer who doesn't appreciate what she has in life and doesn't work hard enough... or something. And Som and TessaBlue have been called worse by the same poster.

Some boomers on here need not be quite so condescending toward the younger folks. We're not all 27 year olds who live with their parents. I'm married with a young child who has spent more time in the hospital than many here (excepting Ballerina). My husband and I just bought our second house. I haven't had help from my parents in 15 years.

I don't know why I keep trying to justify myself to some strangers with clear superiority complexes. Having lived longer doesn't automatically make you wiser or better than anyone else. We're all people, we've all had struggles. No one is better than any other.
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Re: The VENT Thread

Postby Ballerina » Sat Jan 13, 2018 10:48 pm

I am not a boomer - born before WWII, and I wasn't singling anybody out with my comments. If that's what you're implying starrydreamer, lose that thought immediately. Perhaps you forgot to notice my support when you told of the problems you were and still are experiencing with your child when you mentioned it in my Merry Christmas thread. The window candle still burns.
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Re: The VENT Thread

Postby starrydreamer » Sat Jan 13, 2018 11:00 pm

Ballerina wrote:I am not a boomer - born before WWII, and I wasn't singling anybody out with my comments. If that's what you're implying starrydreamer, lose that thought immediately. Perhaps you forgot to notice my support when you told of the problems you were and still are experiencing with your child when you mentioned it in my Merry Christmas thread. The window candle still burns.


Naw, I wasn't, Ballerina. But you can see why comments like that elicit some remarks. I don't even consider myself a millennial- I'm in my mid-30s. But the assumption that we don't work hard for what we have is just rude (not saying you are).

And yes, you've been a supporter of my child and I appreciate it. I'm sorry for calling you a boomer. :lol:

(By the way, I was thinking the other day about Lloydobler - you owned him in partnership some years ago, right?)
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